07 Mar Making a partner plan ~ the partners need for support
Often we have the experience of a father or partner call to inquire about doula services. We love that they are looking out for themselves as well as their birthing partner. It can be an overwhelming experience witnessing and supporting a loved one go through a transformative journey, whether it is as beautiful and peaceful as one had dreamed up or filled with unexpected twists and turn. As birth doulas we support you as a team, keeping the partners role primary
Partners can struggle with anything from exhaustion, to the sight of blood, to the sounds, smells and sights of labor. We find ways to support them ahead of time so they can balance being a loving support and knowing their own self care is important in the long term support they are providing. Self care can look like a nap, nourishment, making a phone call or taking a short run. It might be pulling the doula out into the hall if confused or scared, making eye contact, being heard, having a cry, getting a shoulder rub or being offered a cup of coffee. Helping the non birthing partner support their loved one in labor is very important. As doulas we show partners how to support the mama in labor, that can look like hip squeezes with every contraction or simply letting her know you trust her. It can be overwhelming to see your partner in labor as your doulas we can facilitate you being able to relax and trust the process simply by normalizing. Also, relaxation becomes easier because the doula is watching with knowledge and everything they learned in child birth class is being taken into account. Often, along with the birth preferences form created at a prenatal visit, we also create a partner plan. We believe being supported during birth creates a platform for new parents to better support each other and their baby(s) afterwards. Seeing a new mother and or father holding a new baby with pride within themselves is a beautiful sight.
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